Too easy in life is it to simply watch every one and every thing pass by. At times, we have short and long term goals, drawn to do something we become passionate about. I’m a big believer in everyone having their own “ikigai”; drawn towards a life purpose, whether temporarily or for a much longer period. Recently, I’ve had a strong sense of stagnation - perhaps I have lost track of my ikigai. Having completed some of my largest personal goals such like completing undergraduate university studies, the path forward has never been foggier in the pursuit of a life purpose.
In my younger years (and as most people know about me), music was my biggest passion. From around the age of 14 or 15 I was drawn to learn electronic music production and how to DJ, at a time when overpriced (and now far-outdated) software and overpriced MIDI equipment and an expensive record collection with turntables was necessary for any kind of progress. I’m certainly grateful for those who supported me in helping me learn those varying skills (Matt in Sydney, Daniel and Adrian in Adelaide to name a few - I couldn’t have done it without these people). These days, even though its never been easier to pick up headphones and learn how to DJ, and music production is even more accessible and easier to learn than ever before, I find myself not drawn to revisit making music but to seek a higher purpose. Perhaps it’s a sense of having completed the goals I had when I was younger: Releasing music with a few good labels, DJ support for a few international artists, DJ interstate and proudly host a weekly radio show - These are all things I look back at fondly. In 2023, however, I now feel unfulfilled, and believe there is something more for me to achieve - I feel bound to make a positive impact on the lives of others. Music can have a profound positive impact, but without a doubt, I always feel like there’s more I can do with my time on this planet.
I just don’t know what it is.
Completing a four year double undergraduate degree rewired the way I think about the world. In fact, I wouldn’t have begun writing blog posts if I hadn’t returned to university. I’ve come to believe that it should be necessary (if not, controversially, mandatory) for individuals to attend university should they be able to. The way my brain works now, with the benefit of hindsight, would set me up to be a far more successful musician - but I’m just not drawn back to that world for a plethora of reasons. But the “endless possibilities” of tomorrow seem to cloud my judgement in the present day, and I feel as though there is no clear path to whatever lies next, particularly as a career. Do I explore monetising new hobbies? Do I return to university for postgraduate study? Do I revisit past passions to see if music production still makes my heart sing?
I know I can do anything I want with my life, but there’s nothing simple about choosing a path toward a new future. If you’re someone who has been down this path and found a method to help you work out what comes next, I would be grateful for your input, so please feel free to email me.
As a bonus for coming this far with this blog post, here’s a song that inspired some of its content.